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In it together

Austin Gardner • September 4, 2022

No matter the obstacle or difficulty, my wife, my friend, and my "love" would stand with me.

versión en español a continuación


It nearly broke our hearts when Betty and I left our first church. To this day, those young people are some of the best in the world. Seven of those young people surrendered to the ministry. 


One of them is already in heaven. Words can't describe the friendship we had with his wife and him. My buddy helped me all the time. He knew how to do everything, but I didn't. So he just took care of me. 


They were the most delightful friends. We prayed around their coffee table many nights. 


He was a Marine. Then a master electrician. He later pastored churches, and God used him extensively.


One of the young people in our youth group became the church's pastor today. We loved them so much it hurt to leave.


Betty and I packed up our stuff. We had friends from the church and college that helped us pack up. I gave several fish from my aquarium a burial at sea—the toilet. My Oscar was too big and had to go in other ways.


We arrived at the second church and stayed in the pastor's unfinished basement. Betty and I had to go upstairs to the bathroom. Our son Chris slept upstairs with their son.


We moved from the pastor's house, our friend, to what I called the sweatbox above a church member's outside garage. The church had helped us move our stuff from the basement to the sweatbox. 


You will remember that they placed everything in the middle of the room. It was quite the ordeal to get set up. We barely got set up when a house became available. 


I asked for help moving our stuff from the upstairs apartment to the house. My friend was busy. No one was available, but someone did loan me their pickup.


My feelings were hurt. You will realize in a minute that I acted like a whiny baby. My best friend wasn't helping me; no one appreciated me enough to help. Betty and I singlehandedly moved everything down the stairs, onto the truck, and over to the house.


All day long, Betty and I struggled to move the deep freezer, the dryer, the washing machine, the couch, and the dressers to the new house. We were a great team, but we were exhausted. 


As we lay in our bed in our new house that evening, my heart was bursting with love. No matter the obstacle or difficulty, my wife, my friend, and my "love" would stand with me.


The little rich girl had worked her backside off. She helped haul every piece of heavy and large furniture, and we were finally in our house.


Don't think that the people didn't care. They did! They were at work. We didn't move on the weekend. I didn't give them ample warning. It was my fault that there wasn't any help because the people in that church were as sweet as any you would ever meet or work with. 


The beautiful lesson I learned was that we could! We were together. We were a team. We have been alone many times, but from the time we were 21 and 22 till today, I have never had to doubt if my wife would be with me. Now over all the years, we have had many battles.


Lesson for young people. Don't run off "half-cocked," as they used to say. Give people a chance. We often get hurt because we are thinking so selfishly. 


Marry character. Marry someone who will always be there for you, no matter what. You spend too much time looking at the outside and never checking the inside.


Betty was a believer in the Lord Jesus, and she believed in me.


For all you married folks, I would challenge you to be there for each other. There will be many battles in all our lives. People will disappoint you. People will hurt you and even attack you, but if you marry right, you can spend a lifetime relaxing in your spouse's love.


Do you remember what I said when we got home from our honeymoon? I said that I was the most relaxed I had ever been. I still feel that way with Betty.


Through cancer twice now, covid, conflict, it matters not. So know God and make sure you obey Him in who you will marry.


Get the whole story


Betty, the love of my life 1

The Call 2

Hay Day of my Life 3

"The bro zone!" Like a brother 4

A Giant Heart 5

The tractor ride 6

Never Really Dated! 7

Shocked & Surprised 8

Good News 9

Finding an acorn 10

Scared my dad! 11

Send that hillbilly hiking 12

Who's chasing who? 13

Betty meets my grandmother 14

The longest summer ever 15

Reckless Redneck 16

Honeymoon 17

Separated for the first time 18

We are going to make it 19

Our first ministry 20

We needed a mentor 21

A Mother's Jealousy 22

My sister wanted to marry me 23

Holidays as a Married Couple 24

"Baby Fever" Hits 25

Beauty Sleeping 26

Our First Fight 27

We held Willie B. at gunpoint till the cops arrived 28

The Day Finally Came 29

Learn Some Gun Safety 30

God's Calling on our Lives 31

First Attempts at Soul Winning Evangelism 32

Proud Dad 33

Learning to Give 34

My First Drink of Alcohol 35

Our Next Big Fight 36

Redneck Rubs Off On Betty 37

A Tale of Mice and Women 38


Casi nos rompe el corazón cuando Betty y yo dejamos nuestra primera iglesia. Hasta el día de hoy, esos jóvenes son algunos de los mejores del mundo. Siete de esos jóvenes se entregaron al ministerio.


Uno de ellos ya está en el cielo. Las palabras no pueden describir la amistad que tuvimos con su esposa y él. Mi amigo me ayudaba todo el tiempo. Él sabía cómo hacer de todo, pero yo no. Así que simplemente me cuidaba.


Eran los amigos más encantadores. Oramos alrededor de su mesa de centro muchas noches.


Él era Marinero. Después era un maestro electricista. Más tarde pastoreó iglesias y Dios lo usó extensamente.


Uno de los jóvenes de nuestro grupo de jóvenes se convirtió en el pastor de la iglesia hoy en día. Los queríamos tanto que nos dolía irnos.


Betty y yo empacamos nuestras cosas. Teníamos amigos de la iglesia y de la universidad que nos ayudaron a empacar. Le di a varios peces de mi acuario un entierro en el mar: el inodoro. Mi Oscar era demasiado grande y tenía que ir por otros caminos.


Llegamos a la segunda iglesia y nos quedamos en el sótano sin acabados del pastor. Betty y yo tuvimos que subir para ir al baño. Nuestro hijo Chris durmió arriba con su hijo del pastor.


Nos mudamos de la casa del pastor, nuestro amigo, a lo que yo llamé la caja de sudor sobre el garaje exterior de un miembro de la iglesia. La iglesia nos había ayudado a mover nuestras cosas del sótano a la caja de sudor.


Recordarás que colocaron todo en el medio de la habitación. Fue todo un proceso instalarnos. Apenas nos instalamos cuando una casa estuvo disponible.


Pedí ayuda para mover nuestras cosas del apartamento del segundo piso a la casa. Mi amigo estaba ocupado. No había nadie disponible, pero alguien sí me prestó su camioneta.


Mis sentimientos fueron lastimados. Te darás cuenta en un minuto que actué como un bebé llorón. Mi mejor amigo no me estaba ayudando; nadie me apreciaba lo suficiente como para ayudar. Betty y yo bajamos todo sin ayuda de nadie por las escaleras, lo subimos al camión y lo llevamos a la casa.


Durante todo el día, Betty y yo luchamos para trasladar el congelador, la secadora, la lavadora, el sofá y las cómodas a la nueva casa. Éramos un gran equipo, pero estábamos agotados.


Mientras nos acostábamos en nuestra cama en nuestra nueva casa esa noche, mi corazón estaba lleno de amor. Sin importar el obstáculo o la dificultad, mi esposa, mi amiga y mi "amor" estarían conmigo.


La niña rica sudó la gota gorda había trabajado como ningún otro. Ayudó a mudar cada mueble pesado y grande, y finalmente estuvimos en nuestra casa.


No creas que a la gente no le importaba. ¡Lo hicieron! Estaban en el trabajo. No nos mudamos el fin de semana. No les di suficiente advertencia. Fue mi culpa que no hubiera ninguna ayuda, porque la gente en esa iglesia eran tan dulces como cualquiera que puedas conocer o con quien puedas trabajar.


La hermosa lección que aprendí fue que ¡podíamos! Estábamos juntos. Éramos un equipo. Hemos estado solos muchas veces, pero desde que teníamos 21 y 22 años hasta hoy, nunca he tenido que dudar si mi esposa estaría conmigo. Ahora, a lo largo de todos los años, hemos tenido muchas batallas.


Lección para los jóvenes. No salgas "a medias", como solían decir. Dale una oportunidad a la gente. A menudo nos lastimamos porque pensamos de manera egoísta.


Cásate con carácter. Cásate con alguien que siempre estará ahí para ti, pase lo que pase. Pasas demasiado tiempo mirando el exterior y nunca revisando el interior.


Betty creía en el Señor Jesús y creía en mí.


Para todos ustedes, amigos casados, los desafiaría a estar allí el uno para el otro. Habrán muchas batallas en todas nuestras vidas. La gente te decepcionará. La gente te lastimará e incluso te atacarán, pero si te casas bien, puedes pasar toda una vida relajándote en el amor de tu cónyuge.


¿Recuerdas lo que dije cuando llegamos a casa de nuestra luna de miel? Dije que estaba más relajado que nunca. Todavía me siento así con Betty.


A través del cáncer, dos veces ahora, el covid, conflicto, no importa. Así que conoce a Dios y asegúrate de obedecerle de con quién te casarás.



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